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The Man on the Pedestal

Happy November guys!  Recently I've been thinking a lot about time. Every now and then I get an overwhelming sense of dread and fear of time. How little we have, how easy it is to slip away. You wake up one morning and realise four years have passed. And, alright, you are making progress. You have made it from A to B. But so quickly, so obliviously.  With this sense of dread, there are times when I'm standing in the middle of my day and I wonder how I got there. How I got up that morning, how I'm dressed up and presentable. It's no struggle to get out of bed, or be present. My mind has brought me there, but my spirit has crawled behind. To eleviate this evercreeping dread, I tend to go out of my way to be involved in life, filling up the calendar, making plans and projects. It's a routine, and it's pleasant. And I'm happy, because why wouldn't I be? But sometimes, my spirit catches up. Paves the way and creates a gloriously lit path, and when it does I f

You

Hi guys, I'll save the apologies, it seems as though I'm going to be continuously intermittent on the blog as the months pass. I do miss writing, and I do miss you guys. You really isn't a poem I intended on writing, but I'm glad I did. You see, in the midst of writing The Fictional Dependency series, I found a multitude of locked up emotions and amazing memories that I wished to share. Some were real, others were intricate reflections of my thoughts, ideas, dreams and feelings. Sounds of all volumes. Images of all colours. Everything I pour into my poetry has meaning, and with this one, it has a meaning I don't want to have. It has a memory of a time before I became who I am now. It has a purity of feelings and an outstanding debt. It has a version of me that did not follow through in detail, only in essence. Through all my successes and failures over the past few years, I have found myself here. Perhaps my future is still vibrant, perhaps I don't unde

Evader

Hi guys, I'm making my grand entrance into 2019 with this next one, it's called Evader . If I had an explanation of a scenario for which this poem applies, I would share it with you. The essence of it stems from many times I've experienced in the past.. but finding one to share with my readers was difficult. I guess we all go through things in life that we never share, but I've noticed it sometimes helps to at least understand the mind-frame, vibe, emotional state or environment the people around us have found themselves in before. I feel it helps to understand their soul, ahead of their human cloak. Anyway, since you last heard from me, I have visited the trenches of my mind various times. I dressed in armour, brought my guns and ammunition and hid it out for a bit. But no one shot first, and then no one retaliated. So I stood up, shouted out and the echo was horrifying. I guess what I'm trying to say is I'm my own worst enemy and I've been attacking m

Death Grip

Happy September guys! This next one seems a little ominous, I'm aware. But I have an explanation. I'll start by telling you it's origin. I was watching a movie called "All I See is You" and I heard a song called "In Our Dreams" by Blake Lively. I listened to it on repeat for almost two hours while I pulled open my laptop and just wrote, I didn't have a story topic in mind, I was just whisked away by the melody and the story of the movie. It was just a familiar feeling that washed over me, inspiration and emotion. The food for my writing. Behind the words of the poem, however, is something I have been sitting on for a few weeks. I remember a quote I seen on Instagram that read "Be the person you needed when you were younger" and I recall feeling an intense rush of inspiration from it.. It was a jackpot topic for a poem. But it never came. When I was younger, I dreamed of being a woman of the world, inspirational and memorable. I want

Stereotypical Liar

Hi guys, It has been a while, and it's about time I returned! I took some time away from the blog, first out of choice.. and then slowly it became a bad habit, I just couldn't write anything, I couldn't find words to post. I have a stream of drafts in my posts section with the same lines "I've been in a slump.." I have learned quite a lot this year: how to be a better person, how to withstand difficult situations, how to maintain a positive attitude even when you feel like smashing up the room around you.. But most of all, I've learned that those inspirational quotes are true, despite being cliche. Things do work out, problems get resolved, hearts mend, wounds heal, trees grow back. A few years ago, I recall reporting seeing the trees on my journey home being cut down, removed without being replanted. And years went by, and still they weren't replanted. Instead, they were left, cut down, stacked on top of each other. Rotting. I remember being

Departure Lounge

Happy 2018 guys, I know it has been a long time. Briefly, I'll bring you up to speed - after Anisotropy I put down my pen and jumped into life. Sometimes writer's block can be a good thing, depending on the reason. Since my last post, I traveled to Spain again for a holiday along the Costa Del Sol during Winter. The place was fabulous, but with adventures comes learning, and I came home a little smarter than I left. My intentions to write have also been increasing since I first visited Barcelona last September, there's something magical I find about seeing the world and being above the clouds. Perhaps it's just me finding myself, perhaps it will wear off eventually.. Anyway, I wrote this, while listening to It's OK by Tom Rosenthal .. I guess you could say it was my source of inspiration.. But I'm not sure why. I drafted it during December, forcing myself past the writing barrier, and then just abandoned it. Having reread it now, I actually don't li

Fictional Dependency - Part VI: Anisotropy

Happy December guys! I'm sorry it has been so long since I've posted anything new. I was in a bit of a slump. Apologies seem to be a theme I've got going on recently, I've dished out quite a lot of them - it's exhausting. I've been so busy, I've lost track of quite a number of aspects of my life, and people..a lot of people. But I didn't forget you guys. This month, I've written the next part to the Fictional Dependency series . I thought I had reached the finale of the series with Breaking the Fourth Wall , but then I realised I just opened a door..and left everything in an ambiguous way. Originally, I couldn't visualize a direction for the series. I honestly entered into it blindly. But now, having made reference to my actual circumstances - my reality - I know exactly where I'm headed. You see, sometimes things just don't work. Sometimes there's no reason people part, it's just fate. I completed the bulk of the poem